Before we moved from Canada, we got rid of so many possessions. Believe me, there are more in your house than you think! Some things though, we put into storage. Moving to Costa Rica was an adventure well out side our comfort zone and we weren’t totally sure we would last so as we decided what we would put into storage, we kept that in mind.
And the worry about not sticking it out, was simply that, a worry, because it was such a new and grand adventure for us. And so, while we are back in Canada, we are cleaning, sorting and shifting again. Those security items, “we’ll keep them in case” are just no longer needed.
It’s also been a process of realizing that we are changed people. There isn’t really a measure for that like there is for height or weight. As I touch certain items I remember what it felt like to put them away, wondering, ‘will I be back for these in a year?’ Of recognizing that when we set off from Canada, we felt so unsure – who would we be, who would we meet, would we have what it takes in this new, unknown place? Because that is what it was, unknown. During my journey to health, I experienced the exact same dynamics.
And any journey we set out on for the first time, whether geographical or on the interior map, the destination is unknown and requires the mental process of deciphering what do I keep, what do I take and what do I let go of? I think that process is there for a reason, to help us move through that unchartered middle space between our starting point and the unknown, seemingly far off destination.
The ‘middle space’, between where we are and the unknown destination, is the place where we are easily seduced into returning to safety. However, if there was a reason to leave where we were, it still exists, and the safety of that place will not serve deeply or for long. I will often hear people say, and I have said it myself, “Well, I wasn’t raised that way” or “that’s not the way I have done it”. The transformational life is one of continual sorting, shifting, letting go and moving towards new destinations. And the unsettling feeling of the middle space is one that you can learn to navigate, to find practices, rituals and prompts to keep you moving to the place you truly desire.